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If I don`t `like` your post it`s because I don`t care...
I’m gonna make this girl mine….. Right click, Save As….
I`m not upset because it`s Monday, I`m upset because I have to wear pants
Marriage, because sometimes ruining a person`s life takes serious commitment.
I`ve been told that I never take responsibility for anything, and it`s all your fault.
I´m on a whisky diet. I´ve lost three days already!
I`d like to eat healthy, but we all know what happened that time Eve ate an apple. Best not to risk it.
My wife told me: "Sex is better on vacation." That wasn`t a very nice postcard to receive.
The most frustrating thing I`ve ever tried to do was throw away a trash can.
Might wake up early and go running but I also might win the lottery, the odds are about the same
Airplanes: offering you the comforts of gas station food/drinks at popular night club prices
Don’t compare yourself to others, that’s when you start to lose confidence in yourself.
Do the people inside mascot costumes also smile when they have their photos taken?
My girlfriend says I need to grow up. I think she`s just angry I didn`t give her the password to my pillow fort.
Living alone is pretty cool, I don`t even know if my bathroom door closes