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I hear Internet Explorer 10 is going to allow you to download and install Firefox up to three times faster.
Whoa! Thank you warning label! I was actually considering using my new floor lamp in the shower.
Halfway through singing a romantic ballad to my cat, it occurred to me that I`m going to die alone.
I hate mixed messages. They`re great.
Dark humor is like sex, not everybody always gets it.
Golf would be a lot more fun to watch on TV if the balls were on fire
Calling someone a drama queen is so negative. Why not "content creator"?
My husband woke up this morning with a HUGE smile on his face. I love Sharpie markers.
If you play my workday backwards, it’s actually a nice story about idiots getting less and less annoying.
Go ahead caller 9!!
I thought I was feeling a little bloated today, turns out I had my underwear on backwards.
Is it just me or does the word "retweet" bring up images of Elmer Fudd commanding an army on the defensive?
There is no logical reason why short pants should cost the same as long pants.
Don`t refer to them as voices in your head. Do as the professionals and call them your `team of writers`
Anyone else pretend to work all day while thinking about big boobs instead?