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We`ve all been talking about your paranoia.
2003: Fear that ppl from the internet will find me in real life. 2013: Fear that ppl from real life will find me on the internet.
Nothing makes you feel more like a kid than the right breakfast cereal. Lucky Charms for me please!
I went to McDonald`s to grab my boys a couple of Happy meals. The guy serving me says "Would you like a Boy Toy"? I was like, "listen hear you little sh!t, you couldn`t handle me if you tried"!! What is this world coming too... :))
Kiss her in the middle of her sentence so you don`t have to hear what she`s talking about.
I like to reply to late night snapchat selfies with "what the f*&% is that behind you?!" just because I know the sender has no way to review the photo and will spend the rest of their night scared out of their minds.
Live life to its fullest even if that means eating everything in the fridge
I`m having one of those days where my middle finger is answering all my questions...
I have 500 friends and only 499 Birthday wishes on facebook! I`ll remember that when it`s YOUR birthday #405!!!
Your shadow is a confirmation that light has traveled nearly 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the final few feet thanks to you
I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas...
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
If you want to keep a secret from me, write it down and send it to me as a Facebook event invitation.
Emails from your boss assigning you work do not qualify as cyber bullying. I checked.
There`s actually a website designed to simulate what it`s like to be the sole survivor of a nuclear holocaust, it`s called MySpace.