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Our parents always taught us NOT to write on walls... Facebook teaches us differently
Making an effort in the last of 2014 to cut away distractions so I can spend more time with my iPhone.
Why do people who insult themselves get mad when you agree with them?
Lying in bed, listening to the Doors. I really should oil the hinges...
I always carry a lighter in case I end up at an impromptu concert...or need to set someone`s house on fire. Either way, I`m prepared.
How to create a weight-loss program: (1) Take a before picture. (2) Eat like a pig. (3) Take an after picture. (4) Switch the pictures.
Happy Elastic Waistband Day
Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your room. Those bastards live forever.
Don’t ask me again” is my favorite computer button that I wish was also a real life button.
I said "sad face emoji" instead of actually frowning today if you want to know how out of touch with reality I am.
likes beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate major events such as the my birthday or the fact that that it`s Monday.
I used to think i was good at multi-tasking. Turns out its just my multiple personalities doing one task at a time.
The ideal man doesn`t smoke, doesn`t drink, doesn`t do drugs, doesn`t swear, doesn`t get angry, doesn`t exist
You ever read a status, and you`re like, `what a f*ck up` and then you realize you`re on your own page?
I want my children to have all the things I never had so then I can move in with them.