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Optimism? Sure, it`s worth a try. I don`t see how acting like an eye doctor is gonna help, but whatever.
If you don`t have anything nice to say I would probably enjoy spending time with you
I hear the Pink Panther song when I sneak down the hall for a midnight snack..
Nothing f*cks up your Friday like realizing that it’s only Thursday.
Just moisturized my hands and now I can`t get out of the bathroom. Send help.
It`s been close to a million years since I exaggerated about anything.
Why do they write PIZZA all over the box? What else could possibly be in there???
U still drunk from last night or did u get a new buzz going this morning.
I started studying Tai Chi, so I wouldn`t recommend getting in a slow-motion fight with me...
My hand has never pumped so hard for a little squirt. Stupid empty soap bottle.
have you ever noticed `lol` looks like a drowning person?
A child`s purpose is to help their parents relearn the states and capitals.
It`s not karma, you`re just an idiot.
Happy 15th birthday google, 3 more years and you will be able to search for adult sites legally
In other news millions of facebook user suddenly got their law degree