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If you ever question yourself, your life choices, your sanity...just watch an episode of Hoarders and you`ll be all good.
They say when life gives you lemons….but what if life hands you a rather large banana? What then, my friend? What then?
Wow! it`s late.. I need to hit the sack........ Then go to bed.
I have decided I no longer want to be an adult. So if anyone needs me, I`ll be in my blankey fort... coloring.
If you feel down because you had a bad day! Chin up! Tomorrow is another day and the worst has yet to come!
a friend will calm you down when you`re angry a best friend will run beside you with a baseball bat shouting, "somebody`s gonna get it!"
One day we the women will rap the men lets see how they like it!
There was a glorious time, before social media, when you would just lose touch with people.
Okay, I am getting really irritated. This is the 5th ATM I`ve been to today that`s had "insufficient funds".
After joining Facebook, my TV became radio.
I bet Bruce Wayne sometimes accidentally signs his credit card receipts “Batman” when he’s drunk. I know I do.
I`d hit that. - women drivers
I`m so proud of myself, I spent all night putting my Christmas decorations up myself.. I`m now at the hospital having them removed
Life would be perfect if: Mondays were fun, junk food was healthy, drama didn’t exist, and goodbyes were only until tomorrow.
I just read that ciggarettes cause rectal cancer, I should me fine, I was going to put them in my mouth anyway..