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You`re uglier than..... well, you`re the example.
My neck, My back, My Netflix and my snacks...
It appears that autocorrect has become my worst enema.
RAIN!!!! :) I guess my rain dances must have worked. Some people call it stumbling around... I call it rain dancing.
Is it just me, or do mirrors look really sexy?
I replaced the spare tire in my car with a box of wine. I`ve no idea how to change a tire, & I bet I`ll need a drink as I wait for a ride.
Barbie has an awful lot of things for a girl who`s knees don`t bend.
Does anyone know when is the cut-off date to stop wishing someone Happy New Years?
Call me crazy, but the last person who did is still in a full body cast, so it`s up to you.
Fingerprints are proof that God doesn`t trust us
I wish Facebook would notify me when people deleted me, that way I could like it
What idiot called it the toaster and not the tanning bread?
I´m not cheap, but I am on special this weekend. ;)
If your having a bad day, remember that somewhere on this big planet, someone just lost their straw in a capri sun!!
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.