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Before you decide to spend less time on social media... make sure you go to every social media website and tell everyone.
Pizza: nah, Sex: eh, Drinking: no thanks, It`s so hard thinking of what to give up for Lent...
Yes we`re friends on facebook but that`s where it ends, stop trying to talk to me in real life... mom
I hate it when chicks wear pink camo. I`m like, "girl" where you hiding? Candyland?
don`t kiss the monitor, just ask me nicely..
For you men who think a woman’s place is in the kitchen, remember… that’s where the knives are kept.
Thought of the day! Calling me a crazy bitch will only encourage me to prove you right...
"The secret is that it`s all in the wrist!" -My grandfather talking about golf or handjobs or something
I saw a cool bumper sticker on a back of a SUV . . . “Do you follow Jesus this close?”
When I grow up I wanna be a psychiatrist for the mentally insane...so i can find out what the hell is wrong with you people
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.
"Are u going to the circus?" is a perfectly good sentence when not used as a follow-up 2 your wife`s question: "how does my make-up look?"
We got an extra day this year. Why did it have to be a Monday?
I´m thankful for Facebook. Before, I would just scream out my thoughts to anyone who would listen.
Is it just me, or did anyone else wake up on the SEXY side of the bed this morning?