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Based on the sound of her walking.. My upstairs neighbor seems like the kind of woman that starts sentences with; "Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum.".. O_o
They say love is more important than money. I`d like to see them go and try to pay their bills with a hug.
President Obama says his daughters need minimum wage jobs to "learn what it means to work." May I suggest the same for members of Congress?
Don`t judge if you don`t know me. Unless you`re making my pizza & you say "This guy looks like he wants extra cheese" then please do..
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
State of mind is in no mind to state its state of mind.
When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone’s numbers again, I text them: “Guess who?” for 2 weeks.
You know you`re broke when your Bologna Does Not have a first name!
Everytime someone says "Expect the unexpected" I like to punch them in the face and say "not as easy as it sounds, now is it?"
I like to stand 20 ft in front of the Walmart greeter and greet people before he gets a chance.
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting
Things ain`t nobody got time for: That
I bet the creator of the artificial heart is pretty pissed that we still use "sliced bread" as our basis for great inventions.
I`m at that "licking peanutbutter off a spoon" time to go grocery shopping point....
So apparently RSVP-ing to a wedding invite with "Maybe next time" wasn`t the best response. Who knew?