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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
I am a completely different person when I`m not under female supervision.
My 4yo just shut the bathroom door on me while I was inside and told me I was in jail. So I locked the door. I love this game.
I drink because people talk.
How long do I microwave this 14 lb turkey?
I bet strippers look forward to that feeling of getting home and wearing a bra after a long day at work.
There may be no excuse for laziness, but I`m still looking.
My life is a very complicated drinking game
Every time I lose some weight, I find it again in the refrigerator.
My Superpower is eating 5 times the "suggested serving" size.
Pretty sure I know what my wife`s getting me for my birthday cause when I guessed, "A 3-way?" she got all angry like I ruined the surprise.
Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.
Tell a therapist, Not Facebook.
I thought we had something. You met my family, made me dinner, called me honey. Now suddenly you’re a β€œwaitress” who was β€œdoing her job?”
Dear single guys; open a pet shop selling cats. Let the single ladies come to you.