Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Marriage. When dating goes too far.
It`s really quite simple ... I do what I want! ... The End.
A new study has found that women find it seven times easier to read men’s facial expressions than men have reading women’s. That’s mostly because we’re not looking at their faces ...
2 out of 3 isn`t bad. Unless you come home from the park with 2 out 3 kids.
So she asked me "Do these pants make my butt look big?" And I said, "Not at all dear .. its the fat that does that." So now I´m single again.
Im 6`1", blue eyes, light brown hair, fit, own my own compa......oh crap, wrong website, sorry.
Jehovah`s witnesses would probably be welcomed into more houses if they brought booze or cookies.
My parents say I was an unplanned child, which probably explains why my life isn`t going to plan.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but this is just gardening facts.
To calculate the average number of times a guy has sex per week, multiply the number of fantasy football leagues he`s in by the number zero.
There is no time to check time
Indecisiveness is just mental constipation.
My wife and I are pretty upset. It looks like someone broke in and surfed porn on my computer. They didn`t touch anything else, so that`s good.
You can`t be late until you show up
Sarcasm is a body`s natural defense against stupid people