Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
According to a recent study 52% of women have used vibrators....I`m guessing the other 48% have new ones?
The other day someone told me I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine. I was confused... What is leftover wine?
Sports commentators need to stop saying penetrate
I don`t know why beer companies bother with an expiration date. It`s never going to make it anywhere near that.
has often thought that what doesn’t kill us makes us drink stronger liquor.
Im at my classiest when my neighbor catches me begging my dog to sh!t faster because it`s cold.
When someone rings the doorbell I say to my kids, "I think it`s Santa Claus!" so I don`t have to get up.
I know I`ve had enough to drink when I have to concentrate to blink.
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.
Every Facebook photo album could be titled either "Envy Me!" or "Pity Me!"
I`ve upped my driving skills, no go Up yours!
I`m so, so sorry I started the whole Facebook Is Going To Start Charging thing. I didn`t think it would go THIS far..... sorry
No matter how nice I ask random people, nobody will take me to Funkytown.
I didn`t come here to make friends. I go to the cat shelter for that.
I’m going back to sleep. I refuse to give up on my dreams that easily.