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Why is it called "Alien vs Predator"? Isn`t predator an alien too? They should`ve just called it "Some Aliens"
I left work in slow motion but it didn’t blow up behind me.
I wish I could afford to be as weird as I wanna be.
If a girls tongue being pierced really mattered, then I would have my palm pierced!
"Three blind mice" is probably the most popular nursery rhyme about animal cruelty
The monent of triumph when your bag is the first off the plane.
Honking your horn won´t make them go any faster, but at least they´ll know that you´re an asshole.
My cats always look at me like I should have planned something for us to do.
I`m placing myself in "time-out" until I`m able to play nice with others! This may take a few hours as there are stupid people everywhere!
We`re shutdown, but not `stop collecting taxes` shutdown. - the government
What do you mean my bathrobe is inappropriate? Isn`t it casual Friday?!
If my calculations are correct, I can retire about 5 years after I die.
I was hooked on auctions after only going once... going twice
Learn to fight like you`re the third monkey trying to get on the Ark!
Just seen a homeless dude with a sign that said "too ugly to prostitute."