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I hate those idiots with those bright halogen lights that are blinding, at least they can see my one finger salute.
Note to Denver Broncos: Marijuana is NOT a performance enhancing drug!
I would explain it to you again, but I am fresh out of puppets and crayons.
Instead of calling it the John, I call my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.
Sometimes I like to hold the door for people who are far away so they feel obligated to run just a little. ;)
Ladies, don`t say that men never listen... We can tell you every word of what was said during an NFL pregame or in-game broadcast.
Where there`s a will I want to be in it
Don´t call me crazy. I much prefer the term "mentally hilarious"
I`m just a guy standing in front of a huge pile of laundry wondering how flammable it is.
The Patriots defensive coverage was almost as bad as the coverage by Obamacare.
More people would call the Gambling Addicts Helpline if they made every 5th caller a winner.
Today is national I don`t feel like doing sh!t today. Celebrate accordingly.
I never thought I`d be the kind of person who`d wake up early in the morning to exercise ... And I was right.
I saw a comedian one time who did nothing but make geography puns. talk abbottabad act.
No, PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on facebook.