Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I’m crazy but not “LeBron is better than Jordan” crazy.
This cat poop tastes like I`m about to get yelled at -Dogs
Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
Can`t reach it. Don`t need it.
Don`t get me started Bitches, I don`t come with brakes.
Why does `beans` only mean secret when it`s "Don`t spill the beans?" Why can`t I say I have a dirty little beans to tell you?
The trouble with children is that they´re not returnable.
I`ve been catfishing my best friend for the last 3 weeks. He`s gunna pay me that $50 he owes me or I`m showing these emails to his wife.
If you’re a millionaire and you don’t have trampoline floors or a giant slide that goes from your bed to an olympic sized indoor pool then you should just give me all of your money because you’re wasting it
If at first you don`t succeed, you`ll get a lot of free advice from folks who didn`t succeed either.
You really are the cat`s pajamas, and by that I mean you`re a stupid idea.
I dream about naps.
Obviously the movie "the good wife" is not based on a true story. It`s fiction people.
Twice-baked potatoes, refried beans, etc.: Damn, people, cook it right the first time or get out of the kitchen!
Keep up the good work, people who make free porn available.