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I don`t wanna make this weird but that`s just kinda how I do things.
This bulk box of peanuts I got from Costco tastes like styrofoam.
Do not drink and drive.. because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault !!
The only real difference between my 20s and my 30s is that now I make all my bad decisions before midnight.
"I have no idea. Why don`t you just Google it?" —My answer to just about every question I`m ever asked
New research reported that men enjoy snuggling. A second study showed that men will say anything to get a researcher into bed.
I`m going to be the first person to land on the sun! I know what your thinking and thats why I will be going at night.
Pork is awesome, but it`s best when used as a verb.
Bulimia: Twice the taste. Zero Calories.
I don`t get why girls get so offended by sexist jokes..I think they are just ovary-acting. Seriously..
Never take advice from people on the Internet. Not even this.
I farted in the apple store and everyone got pissed, not my fault they dont have windows ...
If flying is really so safe, then why is it called the `terminal`?
No, I CAN’T believe how early it’s getting dark. After 4 billion years of this happening I was sure this would be the year it didn’t.
There are 10 types of people in the world, Those that understand binary, and those who don`t.