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If running on a treadmill was the only way to recharge our phones we would be the healthiest mofos on the planet.
Just like our bodies, our minds need exercise. That`s why I think of jogging every morning.
Sometimes I just go to work for the free internet.
I always honk when I drive by homeless guys sleeping, just in case they overslept for a meeting
How do I disable the autocorrect function on my wife?
The early bird catches the worm. And the late bird catches one of the other trillion worms left. What`s your point?
What if all this time it`s been Chicken that taste like Frog legs????
Sometimes I get up really early, drink some coffee and read some awesome motivational quotes. Then I go back to bed.
The weekend is just a bittersweet memory.... I won`t cry because it`s over, I`ll smile because for a few miles they believed I was the real bus driver.
Do you know what’d look good on you? Me
Time is precious ... waste it wisely!
For a generation that allowed YOLO, BAE, and KIM KARDASHIAN to happen, you sure have a lot of f*cking opinions on how things should be run.
You might call it lazy ... I call it selective participation.
I wish there was a reality show where people learned grammar.
I just want to alternate between napping and eating all day everyday while getting attention, so basically I just wish I were a dog.