Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "Oh dear, this is going to take more than one night."
   
2. I`m proud of anyone who has quit doing drugs and alcohol, I don`t want to hang out with you now but I`m still proud...
   
3. It´s Friday-O-Clock!!!!!!!!!!!!!
   
4. Maybe it`s the washer and not the dryer that steals the socks.
   
5. A mistress is something between a Mister and a mattress.
   
6. says if you don`t like the way I live my life, than there is some good news... you aren`t me!!
   
7. I just stepped on a cornfkake does that make me a cereal killer ?
   
8. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
   
9. My plan for today? Same as always: Drink coffee and be sexy.
   
10. I just keep telling myself you guys don`t have sex either.
    
11. Go home Polar Vortex....yer drunk.
    
12. are you free tomorrow ?! no I am f**king expensive !!
    
13. I’m going to rename my wifi network to “Surveillance Van #02?. That should keep the neighbors on their toes for a while.
    
14. My biggest fear is that there is no PMS and this is my personality.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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