Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?
   
2. It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
   
3. I always keep a Mexican restaurant on speed dial in queso emergency.
   
4. My girlfriend ended up with a broken nose today because she wouldn`t listen to me... I said,"You`re about to walk into a lamppost."
   
5. If you drink enough tonight, you won`t have to lie when you call in sick tomorrow.
   
6. Mythbusters is basically my childhood with a much larger explosives budget.
   
7. Apparently, when asked "In the event of a fire, what steps would you take?" "F**kin` large ones" is not the correct answer.
   
8. Who decided to call the man purse a satchel and not a douchebag?
   
9. I bet my church never imagined it was even possible to twerk to Amazing Grace.
   
10. Chicken pot pie sounds like a great idea if you add commas.
    
11. I just finished writing an article on "How To Improve Your Memory"- But I forgot where I kept it!!
    
12. You think you love your family but suddenly there`s three of you and one remaining slice of pizza.
    
13. Girl scout cookies suck! I ate like 20 boxes of thin mints and I`m not any thinner.
    
14. A woman just dropped a 20 dollar bill next to me. I thought, `What would Jesus do?`, so I turned it into wine ... Well, I bought wine.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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