Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Turns out that my get rich painfully slow scheme isn`t working out either.
   
2. Never do I feel as lazy and rude as when someone else in the room is vacuuming.
   
3. My roommate is on a date and said he`s convinced she`s coming home with him tonight. I`ve covered his room in Justin Bieber posters. Now we wait.
   
4. Boss: Why aren`t you working? Me: I didn`t see you coming!
   
5. All women are crazy. But, if you pretend to listen to them when they talk, they will let you live.
   
6. Why are kids obese? Maybe because Burgers are $.99, & Salads are $4.99.
   
7. My pet unicorn told me that I was being delusional again. :/
   
8. If I died and went straight to hell, it would take me more than a week to realize that I`m not at work anymore....
   
9. I think you know you’ve got a problem when every letter of the alphabet triggers a porn bonanza in your address bar.
   
10. I`m just looking for a reason not to drink
    
11. Some people are such treasures that you really just wanna bury them.
    
12. It must be very hard to be a Nigerian lawyer who specializes in international inheritance law.
    
13. Breasts are like model trains. They were originally meant for children but grown men always want to play with them.
    
14. Going to make pizza for dinner!! Ingredients Required: Phone, Menu & Credit Card.. Ohhh I can smell it cooking already!! ;)
    
    
    
    
    
    

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