Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Reasons to get out of bed: Food.
   
2. The best moments in life are simple… you know like when you sit down and get comfy and the remote is magically next to you.
   
3. I can`t afford Disney World so we go to the biggest hill on my street and my kids wait an hour before I roll them down in my office chair.
   
4. If I saw a ghost, I would not be scared. I’d be like “Sit your translucent ass down, I have a lot of questions!”
   
5. One man`s girlfriend is another man`s password.
   
6. I`ve been told that I can be condescending... that means that I tend to talk down to people.
   
7. My girlfriend called me lazy the other day. I almost responded.
   
8. Calories: Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little tighter each night.
   
9. I ordered some bubble wrap online. It arrived in a box surrounded by packing peanuts.
   
10. When your parties have glasses instead of red cups, you’re a grown up.
    
11. YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
    
12. Not to brag or anything, but I don`t need alcohol to make really bad decisions.
    
13. My goal in life: Build a time machine and travel forward into the future until I can stop and ask someone "Do you know what `buffering` is?" and they are clueless.
    
14. This getting older thing really sucks. These days my eyes are so bad I have to buy the Large Print edition of Alphabet Soup.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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