Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. I`m definitely the drunkest person in this ball pit.
   
2. I try to avoid nice people, so they can stay that way.
   
3. Coffee : Starter fluid for the morning impaired.
   
4. If I could have dinner with anyone either alive or dead. I would totally choose dead. Because, more food for me then.
   
5. I wouldn`t want lesbian parents. Not because I`m homophobic. I just don`t want to get stuck in an endless loop of "Go ask your mother."
   
6. You`re about 8 beers away from being my type.
   
7. All I`m saying is you don`t see many neck tattoos on Jeopardy.
   
8. Laughter is not the best medicine. Laughter with large amounts of alcohol & wild crazy monkey sex - now that`s the best medicine.
   
9. I`m proud to announce that I`m still the undefeated champion at racing with drivers who don`t know we`re racing.
   
10. If I share my food with you, it’s either because I love you a lot, or because it fell on the floor and I don’t want it.
    
11. Answering your cell when you don`t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.
    
12. Going to Colorado this weekend to go ... "Hiking"
    
13. Didn`t think my day could get any better but my robe has pockets so boom, there you go.
    
14. Will someone please tell ugly girls with small boobs that their opioion doesnt really matter.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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