Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. never be afraid to wipe twice
   
2. Sometimes you can tell it’s going to be a bad day when someone you don’t like is smiling.
   
3. I mixed coffee with Red Bull today..I got half way to work when I realized I forgot my car!
   
4. Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
   
5. Offering a homeless dude $5 from across the street is my version of Frogger.
   
6. Soul mates are people with the mutual understanding that no one else will put up with their sh!t.
   
7. The best part about living by myself is not having to explain a lot of things......a LOT of things.
   
8. I only have a kitchen because it came with the house.
   
9. You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.
   
10. When I was a kid... No wait. I still do that.
    
11. I wish that we lived in a world where a chicken could cross the road without getting its motives questioned.
    
12. Going to Colorado this weekend to go ... "Hiking"
    
13. I`ve been sober 136 days. Not in a row, but still...
    
14. The only reason any of us can spell laboratory is because of Dexter.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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