Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. My TV volume is always set at "f*ck the neighbors".
   
2. I went to the store and saw that Duracell batteries were on sale just before Valentine`s Day. Someone is a marketing genius.
   
3. 363 shopping days `til Christmas and some people already have their lights up.
   
4. I miss being the age when I thought I would have my sh!t together by the age I am now.
   
5. My inner self is in Photoshop
   
6. Empty your medicine cabinet and put another mirror in there. Scares the hell out of snooping house guests.
   
7. If your wife asks you if you know where the broom is, it`s not a good idea to ask her if she is going somewhere.
   
8. Never underestimate a girl’s ability to find things out.
   
9. Did you know? If you were to watch all of the Saw films, it would take you 666 minutes?
   
10. Driving to work would be so much better if I didn’t always end up at work.
    
11. My new year`s resolution is that donuts have no calories.
    
12. Hmmmmm,,,, Turns out all this time, I’ve been using a life couch instead of a life coach.
    
13. “I wonder how much weight I’ve lost.” -Me, after eating one healthy meal.
    
14. Four out of five voices in my head are saying this is gonna` be a great day.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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