Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Who says nothing is impossible. I´ve been doing nothing for years.
   
2. At a four way stop, it`s obvious that the vehicle bearing the most duct tape goes first.
   
3. I don`t really want to make bad choices; but I`m always late, and all the good choices are already taken..
   
4. Hey pigs, stop trying to swallow entire apples. You keep dying!
   
5. Know the rules well so you can break them effectively.
   
6. When I procrastinate, current me really expects a lot out of future me.
   
7. I wish Noah would have swatted those two mosquitoes.
   
8. If someone tells you “it’s better than sex” they’re not doing the sex right.
   
9. Life is like “Facebook” – People will like your problems & comment; But no one will solve them because everyone is busy updating theirs.
   
10. Someday, the time I waste deciding what to watch on Netflix will be shorter than the actual time watching it
    
11. I believe in karma which means I can do bad things to people all day long and just assume they deserve it.
    
12. I have some jokes about unemployment but they need some work.
    
13. I`m really sick of responsibility ... and underwear
    
14. I just googled, "understanding women," the computer crashed.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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