Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. PMS is no joke, you guys. I just ate like three bags of Reese`s Pieces. Oh, and my wife`s really being a bitch.
   
2. SCIENCE FACT: If you close your eyes, you won`t be able to see.
   
3. Patient: "The problem is that obesity runs in my family." Doctor: "No, the problem is no one runs in your family."
   
4. That awkward moment, when you wake up with one sock on.
   
5. When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn`t hire stupid people.
   
6. If Monday had a face, I´d punch it.
   
7. Royal baby was born at 8 pounds. Thats like 12 dollars.
   
8. If you laid out all of the people in the world who were ever mean to me, I could then drive my car over them.
   
9. i dont like ling distance relationships so i move the fridge to my room
   
10. Hey guy in the car behind me... Honking your horn isn`t going to help me type any faster.
    
11. I am not particularly bad at cooking but how long is pasta supposed to stay in the toaster ?
    
12. What am I taking to the Family Thanksgiving feast? Tupperware.
    
13. They say you are what you eat. I don`t remember eating a sexy beast this morning...
    
14. Cops are allowed to tell women they have the right to remain silent, but when I do it I wind up with a fork in my leg.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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