Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. I don’t go to bars for the same reason I don’t grocery shop when I’m hungry. I always come home with things I didn’t need.
   
2. In movies, do actors wear costume underwear? Or underwear from home? The whole thing is confusing. I don`t think I can keep watching movies
   
3. I`m at the age where I need at least 3 weeks advance notice before doing anything spontaneous
   
4. funny
   
5. If your camel toe looks like a elephants hoof, you might want to rethink the yoga pants.
   
6. The perfect time for a snack is while you’re waiting for another snack to finish cooking.
   
7. I don`t like people who can`t make fun of themselves. It means more work for me.
   
8. I`m emotionally constipated. I haven`t given a crap in days...
   
9. There are days when everything goes perfectly. . I wonder what those are like?
   
10. Note to self: Asking the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your Facebook status in no way helps you get out of a DUI.
    
11. I always clench up before I drive into a tunnel because I`m afraid Wile E. Coyote might have just drawn it on there.
    
12. I`ll tell you what`s wrong with modern society. Nobody ever drinks out of the skulls of their enemies anymore.
    
13. Anyone else find it odd that on Star Trek, when they "boldly go where no one has gone before" they always end up meeting someone?
    
14. That awkward moment when you can’t tell if it’s a Halloween costume or their regular clothes…
    
    
    
    
    
    

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