Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. It has been brought to my attention that those stick figure decals on vehicles are not "kill" scores, but actually suppose to represent members of the family. I will be removing all my decals to avoid any further confusion.
   
2. I try to avoid nice people, so they can stay that way.
   
3. The sun shouldn`t be allowed to come out until after your hangover.
   
4. Went into a five-star hotel to use the bathroom and now it`s a two-star hotel.
   
5. I just awesomed all over the place.
   
6. Don’t look unless you’re prepared to see.
   
7. New Years - the only day where its socially acceptable to drink this early.
   
8. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
   
9. Money may not buy happiness but it can certainly improve the quality of your misery
   
10. Dear God, I´ve been very good today, no grumpy thoughts, no swearing and I haven´t been mean at all, but I´m about to get up now and I may need your help :)
    
11. At this stage of my life, "Good in Bed" means not snoring or stealing the covers.
    
12. Do watch out for elderly neighbours in the heat wave. They`re liable to trap you for hours and talk about the weather.
    
13. Excellent Group Ice Breaker: Do you think sailors feel pressured to swear?
    
14. How much tequila goes into mashed potatoes again?
    
    
    
    
    
    

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