Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Life would be a lot easier if employers accepted excuses like “I’m sorry I can’t come into work today, I’m sleepy”
   
2. Coffee has given me unrealistic expectations of productivity.
   
3. At least clean up the bathroom before taking your profile picture.
   
4. Drinking coffee in the afternoon is like eating the mushroom that makes you big in Super Mario.
   
5. Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear.
   
6. likes to end all my phone calls with "Ok, I`ll see you later on at the party!" and then quickly hang up. Let them figure it out.
   
7. Guys write songs about girls they love. Girls write songs about guys they have broken up with
   
8. I`ll be drinking tell I see Leprechauns tonight.
   
9. hmmmm...halo or horns today??
   
10. My wife said to go out and buy something that makes her look hot & sexy for Valentine`s Day! So I got drunk.
    
11. The song "Take me out to the Ballgame" is sung almost exclusively by people who are already at a ballgame.
    
12. My thoughts should be ashamed of themselves.
    
13. Words and phrases I hope do not appear in my obituary: "Skeletal remains", "Dumpster", "Beyond recognition", "Decapitated", "Dental records", "Shallow grave", "Strewn", and "Suicide by Cop."
    
14. Welcome to fight club..., you may now kiss the bride.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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