Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. 30 years later and my Cabbage Patch Kid still has no clue that he`s adopted.
   
2. People who don`t know what they want should not use the drive thru!
   
3. I watch CSI for the great tips they give out.
   
4. I don`t care if you`re here to murder me - we take our shoes off in this house.
   
5. For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.
   
6. Tuna are probably pretty annoyed with how much we worry about catching dolphins in our tuna nets.
   
7. I can take care of my drunk friends, so the responsibility of having children doesn`t worry me.
   
8. I’m the king of balancing more trash on top of an already full trash can.
   
9. I`m not leaving here without some kind of balloon
   
10. People often say laughter is the best medicine, but they neglect to mention that an overdose can cause one’s ass to fall off.
    
11. I like to punish people who ask me how I`m doing by giving them a detailed description of how I am doing.
    
12. If you start smacking people with your wife`s purse she won`t ask you to hold it for her anymore
    
13. Being alive is so expensive.
    
14. You never outgrow sleepovers, they just become coed.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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