Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. I might not be a great example, but I´m one hell of a good warning.
   
2. It hurts when you goto unfriend someone only to discover they beat you to it
   
3. Watching a movie with the girlfriend tonight. Can anyone recommend a good girlfriend?
   
4. To whoever finds the $20 I dropped last night: spend it on alcohol. It`s what I would have wanted.
   
5. The right man will love you unconditionally, will be loyal, and will always be happy to see you. ... Oh wait, That`s my dog. My dog does that.
   
6. Don`t get me started Bitches, I don`t come with brakes.
   
7. Feeding my kid cold pizza. They will be off to college soon and preparation is the key to success.
   
8. How come there`s never enough dirt to refill the hole even after you`ve put the body in? Asking for a friend
   
9. Made some terrible life choices the last few years. Just kidding. I`m married and not allowed to make decisions.
   
10. Next time some one does something REALLY stupid, just smack them and say, "Man, did you see the size of that bug?"
    
11. I just finished writing an article on "How To Improve Your Memory"- But I forgot where I kept it!!
    
12. I`d go to church if they had Wi-Fi.
    
13. You know it`s a classy establishment when they quietly ask you to leave.
    
14. My body needs a refresh button.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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