Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. I smile when I`m having dirty thoughts :)
   
2. If you need to rush somewhere, carry a fire extinguisher. Nobody will stop a person running with a fire extinguisher.
   
3. Is it polite or rude to slide a note into the bathroom stall next to you that says, "heard you farting but it`s ok you`re in the right place :)"
   
4. You will never be happier than a girl who just discovered her dress has pockets.
   
5. From what I can gather, men hit their sexual peak around age 18. And women hit theirs as soon as the divorce is final.
   
6. "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, & nothing but the truth" ... I choose dare, your honor
   
7. If I have ten pieces of bacon and you take five pieces, what do you have? Thats right., A black eye and a broken hand!
   
8. If I have to stir it, it’s homemade.
   
9. It`s so expensive being a woman. I know because I have financed a few.
   
10. Announcement: .. the Time Travelers Meeting scheduled for today will be held last Thursday
    
11. Having a dirty mind makes simple conversation much more exciting!
    
12. In theory, sex should be grosser than letting someone borrow your toothbrush, but it`s not.
    
13. If the breakfast club took place now, all those kids would just be silently texting about their sh!tty Saturday & never make friends w/ each other.
    
14. I don`t mean to brag... but I`m a pretty damn good peek-a-boo opponent
    
    
    
    
    
    

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