Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
   
2. Don`t half a$$ anything. F*ck it up all the way.
   
3. At church they said the number of the beast is 666, but I stood up and said that`s not my wifes phone number.
   
4. Babysitters are just teenagers who behave like adults so that adults can go out and behave like teenagers.
   
5. Something I never said as a kid: My book stopped working.
   
6. If at first you don`t succeed then you`re a loser...
   
7. I think I`m approaching my "best if used by" date
   
8. After opening this month`s electric bill, I am no longer scared of the dark.
   
9. What Flickering Lights Mean: 1% Electrical problems 99% demons and sh!t.
   
10. Some people need a shock collar. I need the remote.
    
11. CPR is the human version of blowing in to a video game cartridge hoping it`ll work again.
    
12. Be careful when you`re watching a movie with your wife. You`re gonna get blamed for whatever the guy in the movie does.
    
13. I’m moving to Africa. Apparently there I can eat for 12 cents a day.
    
14. How many Weight Watcher points are in an entire bottle of wine?
    
    
    
    
    
    

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