Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. People who are about to tell you something then say "never mind" are the reason why I sometimes admire serial killers
   
2. Oh and BTW,,, Why haven`t Pig Pen`s parents been visited by child services yet?
   
3. I can`t get the cork off my dinner.
   
4. I don`t "get lost". I find creative ways to get places I didnt know I wanted to go.
   
5. Yesterday was international ninja day and I didn`t even know. Well played ninja day, well played.
   
6. I have this talent of getting tired without doing nothing.
   
7. I`m fortunate that anger and nicotine have zero calories.
   
8. OMG, you`re huge! There`s no way you`ll fit inside me.- My clothes probably.
   
9. 4 out of 5 dead husbands agree that last casserole tasted really strange.
   
10. I once shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.
    
11. Arguing with people in the comments section is like crack for me. I don`t do it.
    
12. I think I will stick to my old fashioned pepper shaker. This new pepper spray tastes terrible on my potatoes...
    
13. I lost 3 pounds over the weekend, but not to worry I found them lastnight at pizza hut
    
14. I`m that friend you have to explain to people before you introduce me... And apologize for after.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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