Saturday July 20, 2024

Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

Daily Silly Status has scoured the internet for the most witty statuses, silly statuses and down right funny statuses. We are pleased to now share our findings with you our Daily Silly Status readers. Enjoy our growing collection of over 25,000 silly statuses and share them with your friends and family and help bring a smile, chuckle or laugh others. Remember to check in for daily updates.

  1. Ziploc`s idea of how big a sandwich should be is very different than mine.
  2. I’ve robbed banks before and they’re never getting their pens back.
  3. The most terrifying thing a woman can say to me is "notice anything different?"
  4. Waiter: Would u like ur coffee black sir? Me: What other colors do u have?
  5. I have an oven with a "stop time" button. It´s probably meant to be "stop timer" but I don´t touch it, just in case.
  6. Roughly 82% of my day is trying to decide what my next meal will be
  7. None of my friends laugh at any of my jokes because cats can only meow.
  8. Time to train for my favorite winter sport. Extreme Hibernation.
  9. The guy who used to proofread Hitler`s speeches was the first grammar Nazi.
  10. I like to jump onto people`s backs as an unexpected piggy back. but sometimes I get carried away
  11. A young man gets sent to jail,and gets put into a jail cell with a convict the size of the Incredible Hulk. After lights out, he hears a whisper from the top bunk."Let`s play Mommy and Daddy. Who do you wanna be?" Thinking quick, the man says "daddy." "Then come up here and suck Mommy`s d!ck."
  12. According to serving sizes tonight, I`m a family of 4.
  13. I`m Dave, or as the ladies like to call me... "Hey, you! Behind the bushes!"
  14. I don`t own a thesaurus, is `cock meat` a synonym for `fried chicken`?