Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Why I don’t like people: 1% logical reasons. 99% just because.
   
2. I`ll act my age when I`m 69..
   
3. I always carry a lighter in case I end up at an impromptu concert...or need to set someone`s house on fire. Either way, I`m prepared.
   
4. If you are naughty go to your room, if you wanna be naughty go to mine :)
   
5. If I had any self control I`d probably eat that too.
   
6. To all those who received a book from me as a Christmas present, they are due back at the library today.
   
7. If I pat you on the back, there`s a 99% chance that I`m only using you as a napkin
   
8. I hate it when totally random strangers ask me stupid questions like "Why are you licking me?"
   
9. That awkward moment when you imagine your own funeral...
   
10. Last time I saw jugs that big, 2 hillbillies were blowing on them.
    
11. As I got older my six-pack turn into a keg.
    
12. Actually, when I went to New Orleans, I blacked out too.
    
13. Gluten free. Dairy free. Fat Free. I love the wine diet!
    
14. I don`t understand why people pay therapists when I`ll tell them what`s wrong with them for free.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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