Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Wine: How classy people get trashed.
   
2. The first order of business for the 115th Congress: blaming everything on the 114th Congress.
   
3. I was sitting on the toilet when the guy in the stall next to me started smoking. Disgusting . . . I nearly couldn’t finish my sandwich.
   
4. I prefer to be crazy and happy rather than normal and bitter......
   
5. "Hello Kitty" should have been a brand of condoms...
   
6. Sometimes I spend whole meetings wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.
   
7. My parents told me: “You’ve got to stop watching so much TV, and read more!” so I turned on the subtitles.
   
8. Don’t get your panties in a bunch. The nicer ones are sold individually.
   
9. Magic words that make my children disappear: 1) Bath time. 2) Who did this?!?! 3) When I was your age...
   
10. My hearing is fine. There`s no need to repeat yourself! I ignored you perfectly well the first time.
    
11. It´s not that I hate you, it´s just.. well I´ll put it this way.. if you were on fire & I had water, I´d drink it.
    
12. That sound the Ketch-up make when you squeeze out the last drop, NEVER fails in making people laugh
    
13. Whenever I hear "let me tell you the truth", I secretly cross my fingers, hoping they say "brownies are healthy, eat as many as you want."
    
14. roses are red,violets are blue,god made me beautiful, what happen to you..
    
    
    
    
    
    

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