Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses!

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1. Sorry that offended you, I really didn’t think you’d get it.
   
2. Clearly the people that design refrigerators don`t know me if they think one tiny cheese drawer and two giant vegetable drawers is the way to go.
   
3. Lottery gives you a 1 in 200M chance of skipping work tomorrow...alcohol is 1 in 5. You play your game...I`ll play mine
   
4. It`s crazy that your brain can calculate where to put your hand to catch a 98 mph fastball... But won`t keep your mouth shut when a woman is angry
   
5. In actuality, Batman is just a more violent and dark version of Inspector Gadget.
   
6. Never take advice from me, you`ll only end up drunk......
   
7. You can tell a lot from a woman by her hands. For instance, if they`re placed around your throat she`s probably slightly upset.
   
8. I bet there`s a rapper trying to figure out a way to replace his teeth with LED lights
   
9. Despite being a pain in the a$$, you have to admit I still bring a lot to the table.
   
10. I want one of those jobs where people ask, “Do you actually get paid for doing this?”
    
11. I hope I’m the last guy on earth — I wanna see if all those women were lying to me.
    
12. Me on New Years Eve: “I suggest we drink before we go out drinking.”
    
13. I`d say that most of my mistakes can be traced back to when I decided to get out of bed. ... just sayin! ;)
    
14. How easily you`re offended is directly proportional to how dumb you are.
    
    
    
    
    
    

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