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The easiest way to keep a secret is without help
What does lolz mean...Laugh out loud zebras?
Tip to get out of jury duty: Begin every answer with “According to the prophecy.”
i don`t know what to say on your comment so i just hit "like" so you won`t be upset that ignored you.
"Three blind mice" is probably the most popular nursery rhyme about animal cruelty
I hope I never go to jail because I haven`t memorized a phone number since 2001
Scientists have recently discovered that approximately 2% of Earth`s water at any given time is found on Tupperware containers being removed from the dishwasher
would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Hey people who say I am boring and not interesting; FYI the police just called saying they want to talk to me because I am "a person of interest"
Wife says to her husband, "You wanna change positions tonight?" He says, "Yeah!" she says, "OK, you do the dishes and I will sit on the couch and fart."
Finally in bed. No better time to start thinking about every possible thing that has or ever could happen.
When I was younger my dad showed me pictures of why to wear condoms during sex. The funny thing is, they were all pictures of me.
Just because I`m nodding my head at appropriate times while you`re talking doesn`t mean I give a sh!t about what you`re saying..
How I sing it: "A, B, C, D, E, F, G,....H, I, J, K, A LEMON OH PEE!....Q, R, S....T, U, V....W, X....Y, and Z."
Little known fact: Walt Disney was the inventor of modern day text talk "M - I - C... C u real soon... K - E - Y... Y? Because we like u"