Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The Wizard of Oz is really just a cautionary tale about the lengths a woman will go to for the right shoes.
When I`m home alone, every noise I hear is a serial killer
We still don`t know sh*t about that airplane. - NEWS
No officer, my speech isn`t slurred. I`m just talking in cursive.
I prefer my kale with a silent "K"
A "long story" is just a short story that no one wants to tell.
God is creative... I mean look at me??
I believe in helping the homeless. That`s why every year I buy a new refrigerator and throw away the box.
Iām starting to think we as a society may be trying to do too much with the Dorito.
You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn`t come back, what you`ve lost is a normal pigeon.
If your having a bad day, remember that somewhere on this big planet, someone just lost their straw in a capri sun!!
United Airlines was just voted number one in Chinese takeout!
Sometimes, when dealing with people, you can`t help but stop and think, "Yup, I`m about to get my first assault charge."
Cactuses are just heavily armed cucumbers.
"Have you ever wondered if the $1 bills in your wallet were ever in a stripper butt? - You`re wondering now!!!"