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Guy asked me where a public phone was. I told him 1987.
Call me old fashioned but I prefer women with eyebrows made out of hair
A word of advice, stay on my good side. My good side is in Hawaii.
FACT: Candy corn is made out of melted down traffic cones.
Sorry for illegally downloading your music, guy who mostly makes songs about doing crime.
Normal people scare me ... But not as much as I scare them. :)
Why are there never any good side effects? Just once I`d like to read a prescription bottle that says, "May cause extreme sexiness."
I don’t know what my neighbor’s name is and we’ve been neighbors too long for me to ask.
Today`s society is a good example of what happens when you let the clowns run the circus.
It`s bad luck to be superstitious.
Hey, how long are you supposed to chase someone after they steal your wallet? Cause I`m getting tired of running and he`s catching up to me.
Ever been in the middle of writing a great post and think, did I just run someone over?
gets drunk on one drink. The trouble is, I can´t remember if it´s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
Not to brag, but I still owe Blockbuster $2.00 for not rewinding Weekend at Bernies.
I say No to drugs but they... won`t listen.