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Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training, right?
Guns don`t kill people. Girls who get tagged in a photo before they get a chance to see it kill people.
A 6-month wait when filing for divorce, but only a 15-day wait when buying a gun. I think the solution for relationship problems is clear.
Do not drink and drive.. because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault !!
According to a recent survey, 98% of people responded with "Go away."
Give fat people a break. They have a lot on their plate.
You`re single? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. Yea me too.
The problem with alcohol is that... it wears off.
Waldo’s mom must be worried sick.
Maybe the government just needs to control/alt/delete and then restart in safe mode.
One man’s potato is another man’s vodka.
I don`t understand why I cant lose weight. I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
Alarm Clock(n): An evil device invented by Satan to disrupt the peaceful sleep of otherwise happy folks at a predetermined hour.
10 million people share the same birthday as you. Your personalized horoscope means sh!t.
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...