Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I don`t understand no one has excepted my boiling water challenge
I find it ironic that it takes 12 steps to get a beer out of my fridge.
My neighbors listen to some excellent music. Whether they like it or not.
How to live a happy life: 1)Do whatever you want 2)Don`t worry 3)Eat whatever you want 4)Don`t take advice from strangers on the internet
We had a power outage last week and my PC, TV and games console shut down immediately, so I had to talk to my family for a few hours. They seem like nice people.
I like my women how I like my straws …. Bendy and full of liquor.
I like to spend Monday morning trying to remember what I was avoiding doing at work on Friday.
If you scream in a library, people just look at you funny. If you scream on an airplane, everyone joins in.
?"Oh! Oh! Oh!" Dyslexic Santa
Two wrongs may not make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.
Donuts: An excuse to eat cake for breakfast.
Sometimes you have to flip out and go bat sh!t crazy to make a point.
I do yoga to relieve stress. Just kidding. I drink wine in yoga pants.
I wish that some of my coworkers were not allowed in the break room because those are the people I need a break from.
Drop it! Please, just DROP IT. - My dog, whenever I`m eating.